CNF: Child Like Dreams

Title: Child-Like Dreams

I’ve always had big dreams. When I was a child, I knew exactly what I wanted to do. I often tell people that the years in between were lost years when I let others tell me what’s best and that I’m finally back on track. It’s true. I wrote my first story when I was seven years old and I knew I wanted to become an author. In high school, I let my parents convince me to change my mind. My mother always knew I loved to write but told me those were child-like dreams. Childish dreams. She said I needed to do something that made money and that “writer’s don’t make money, they struggle, and they can barely pay their bills” and with my soul beaten down, The Great Change happened: I went to school for architecture.

After steps taken backward, and some forward, I found myself 10 years later without a degree, in a new state, fortunately estranged from my family, and unsure of my future and the goals therein. I thought, “why not?” Then there I was, enrolling in school to pick up with the child in me left off: Back at University to become a writer.

Recently, I wrote a piece for an University magazine titled “10 Years Late to University: I don’t Belong Here But I Belong Here” about my experience with being a new mother as well as being a student again, after years in the workforce. It mostly covered my emotions after I enrolled, I had completely overlooked the rest of the story. The Beginning.

When I was seven years old I was already reading the classics, adult books, and fantasy chapter stories. They allowed me to escape the constant barrage of memories circling abuse, neglect, and abandonment dealt to me. I filled my soul with Melusine, The Westing Game, Summer of my German Soldier and The Golden Compass.

In these stories, I thought I had the answer to the rest of my life. I was overwhelmed with the idea of being a writer and wrote my first story. I’ll never forget the joy that filled me when my main characters came to life on the page. A cat and a dog, who were best friends, go on an adventure. It was the simplest plot. The dog died, having been injured, and the cat was unbelievably sad. She spent her days and nights moping over her dead friend, afraid to go on any future adventures. Then, the dog came back to life and the cat was rejuvenated.

As silly as this feels, it was a pivotal moment for me. I didn’t realize, until I became an adult, that this was my way to interpret my own feelings of loss after our family dog, Pepper, died horrifically. After watching my biological brother, and my adoptive nephew, jump the fence many times Pepper jumped while we were at church – not realizing that she still had the chained collar around her neck. A man who had been driving by spotted the dog, knocked on the door, and told my father what he had found. Although they tried to be secret, my brother and I were in hiding and watched as our dog was lifted from where she hung and buried in the backyard.

In this story, I was the cat who couldn’t deal with the loss of the only person who loved her unconditionally. The cat dealt with the same issues with abandonment that I struggled with, that I still struggle with, and wasn’t able to recover on her own. I knew that in the real world animals, and people, couldn’t come back to life but when it came to my writing anything could happen.

Anything. As an adult this felt like a way for me to be ok with the memories of someone after they’ve gone, whether unwilling through death or wiling through my growth. I didn’t realize that in an odd way, I was writing nonfiction.

Ironically, the person who crushed my dreams of becoming a writer, and made me change my mind about my prospective college major when I was in high school, was the same person who tried to crush my writing spirit. My adoptive mother. I let her read this five page story and she destroyed it. She told me animals couldn’t talk, that they didn’t go on adventures, that cats and dogs would never be best friends, and that – most importantly – no one, absolutely no one, ever came back to life.

I was angry and told her that I could write whatever I wanted because it was my book. My writing. I told her I never wanted her to read anything I wrote, ever again. I vowed, that day, to become a writer. I was more determined than ever to create worlds where impossible things could happen. I wanted to write books where the dead would rise, unlikely pairs would come together, and adventures would abound.

Over those years, I would daydream about becoming a professor with a messenger bag and a notebook filled with ideas and inspirations. I dreamed of having a cabin where I could escape the world, and its tragic intricacies, and write novels. I also wanted an apartment in the city where I could live when doing readings and signings at bookstores for all my bestselling works. Boy, wasn’t I ambitious.

Now, ten years after The Great Change, after the shit show that was my first time in college, after I let others push me down and trample my dreams, and destroy my spirit, I am back here. I enrolled at the University and now I’m close to graduation. I will be going to grad school next year. I will publish in both nonfiction and fiction. I will become a professor and I will finally fulfill my child-like dreams.

Goodbye January 2020! 13 Books Read!

I’ve read 13 out of 120 books for 2020 so far!

Heya!

It is officially the second month of the new decade! How are you feeling? How was your January? Did you read any books that you loved in January? Did you create a Reading Goal for this year?

I have a goal of 120 books for the year 2020.

I wanted to keep my goal realistic as I have a tiny human, a small business, am a full time student while prepping my grad school applications, and I’m also focusing on my own writing. One goal that I made was to take time to read every day. That way no matter what life does to me I am still doing something I love consistently.

Curling up with a great book is almost always the answer!

I’ve split between audio books and physical books. Sometimes I have to do so many things around the apartment, or I’m commuting, and I can’t hold a book in my hand. I’m chasing Naomi, feeding Naomi, changing Naomi, doing homework or cooking, etc, etc, etc, etc, I could go on. Audio books and a pair of blue tooth headphones are essential for a new mom!

(As I type this Naomi has given up playing with her toys. She stood fussing at the side of my chair until I picked her up. So now I’m typing this one handed. Perfect example of when an audio book would be useful!)

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This is a busy life!

January Books: 

I was able to get in books on minimalism and meditation, a handful of romance novels, a nonfiction graphic novel, science fiction, and paranormal romance!

Also!! This crazy thing happened. The other day I was tired of trying to find a book to read, going through my endless TBR, so I randomly chose an audio book on my way to school. I didn’t read the synopsis or anything. The cover intrigued me so I clicked “Borrow”. It was The Oxford Inheritance by A. A. McDonald. I looooved it. It was fantastic. I really enjoyed listening while the story unfolded.

Then today I was at the $1 Store and I saw the book in person! It was a complete and utter surprise and I knew I had to buy it. I know, I know. “How are you keeping up with minimalism if you keep buying things?” you might ask. I loved this book. It sparked joy for me. And that’s all the criteria I’m using before I buy something and bring it into my home.

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In total I’ve read 13 out of 120 books.

Good Readdance,
Jade

31 Days of Introspection: Week 3: Relevant vs Irrelevant Information

Heya,

So…the oddest thing to think about is the fluidity of life. My thoughts from one week to another. The way things change just by a few well  timed words. It’s all incredulous and I’m in awe at how things turn about.

From last weeks summary, I remember an emotional rant about perception and deleting my Facebook because of my inability to externalize the opinions of others. This week, my guy and I were out on our upstairs porch, him standing with one hand tucked in one pocket, the other balancing a thick cigar between two fingers, and I, sitting on the roof with my knees pulled up close to my chest, two boxes of matches jammed between my sock and the edge of my sweats, my cigar dangling from my fingers.

We chat about life. Our goals, as if we aren’t already aware of each other’s aspirations, and any emotional hindrances from the week. It’s not until rain starts to patter on the porch, chasing us inside, silently down a flight of stairs (so as not to wake baby Naomi), and onto our screened in porch that we get to the meat of it all.

This is something we regularly did, him and I, before Naomi was born. It wasn’t just cigars. Often times we’d go out to hookah lounges, or our favorite cafe that serves hookah, and we’ll spend hours entwined in each other’s legs, our thoughts mingling. This night, we discuss minimalism and how I’m on this new journey of decluttering and keeping only the things that “spark joy” and how he’s a natural minimalist and doesn’t even know it. He tells me how appreciative he is that I’ve taken this huge leap to make our house more of a home. That it’s safer for Naomi to scramble about on fawns legs because I’ve gotten my shit up off the floor and gotten rid of piles of useless, unread books. There’s a compliment in there somewhere.

Our convo, now that we are in the throes of Our Time, turns to what he calls Relevant and Irrelevant Information. I tell him how I want to delete my social media. How it all just makes me feel like shit. Why do I need justification? Why do I need people to “Like, Comment, and Subscribe” (Blah blah blah)? Why can’t I just get on and happily watch cat videos without thinking no one cares about me? That no one loves me? That their opinions cut so deep without them saying anything? And yes, we are long since working on my aforementioned abandonment issues from childhood, but this is a deeper level of questioning. This isn’t just the want to understand. This is the want to change.

He flicks the ash from the end of his cigar and turns to look at me. I don’t know if it shows in my face, as I gaze back at him, but I need to know. “You can never change the perception of others,” he says. “It has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. Their opinion, negative or positive, is just that. Their opinion.” I nod but my mind wanders and I think about all the “branding” lessons I’ve learned in business and how it makes a difference when showing “yourself” to clients or employers/employees.

What he’s talking about is different. “If you knew someone didn’t like you, Jade, you’d want to know why…” he knows me so well. I’d have questions, internally at least. “I don’t want to know why,” he said. “It doesn’t matter to me. Even if they were  to tell me, what would I do with this information? I wouldn’t change myself to suit their needs. So why?” This -another thing we discussed at length- might make him sound arrogant but as someone who knows and loves him I can tell you, he is not. But that sentence right there tells you how much I care. What he was saying made sense to me though, or maybe it’s because we have a bond. He cares what Naomi thinks, I think, and the opinions of his parents but there’s little else that can shake him. I’m strong like that, but definitely not in the area. I care a little too much.

Later, when our cigars have burned down and I’ve had to pinch the lip end of mine with both hands so as not to burn my lips as I drag, I tell him an experience I once had with perception. “I once had this girl tell me she didn’t like me because I was too happy. Seriously, she was mad because I always walked around happy for no apparent reason.” Now, this was before the pregnancy losses, before the attack in college, before adult life chewed me up and spit me out again. I had a rough childhood. An angry one, and in that sliver of between time that was the last two years of high school, I had gotten to a place where optimism and light were my unspoken motto and she stomped all over it.

“So…” he flicked his cigar again, “ what did you do with that information? Be less happy?” He had that sly, sideways look. With one corner of his mouth tilted up and one caterpillar-like eyebrow raised.

“Right?” I smiled ruefully and handed over the scorching hot butt of my cigar. I folded my legs beneath me and tilted my head at him incredulously. Because I’d never thought of it that way. Yes, I always remembered that mantra that force into you as a kid ‘be who you are’ and ‘it’s okay to not be liked’ but I never took ownership of my own feelings in the matter. Responsibility of the part I played. I did dim my light for her. I remember seeing that chick in the halls and feeling like I couldn’t smile. Like I couldn’t be happy.

“See, the problem is that people aren’t honest with themselves. Be honest, Jade. You want people to like you. You want everyone to like you. Most people do.” I wasn’t offended but I did feel attacked. Damn, Bear (my nickname for him).

“Well,” I said. “It’s not that I want everyone to like me.” I took in a deep breath and he lifted an eyebrow. “I don’t have a problem with people not liking me! I don’t! I just…want to know why!”

”But it’s not Relevant Information,” he said. He went on this long monologue about how Relevant Information is the Information you get that you can actually utilize. Mostly from those you genuinely care about, and vice versa, and secondary players in your life that still affect you- like a boss or mentor. It’s constructive criticism. It’s when people build you up. It’s kudos. It’s even when someone is giving the harsh truth that might make you WAKE up, ask the hard questions, or the feedback that pushes you to strive harder toward your dreams.

“Irrelevant Information”, he says before taking a long drag on the remnants of his cigar and expelling slowly, “is all that information from the unimportant people in your life that you can’t use. it’s the opinions that serve no other purpose than to bring you down.” It’s what that girl said about disliking me because I was too happy. Was I supposed to dim my light? Why did I? What did I gain from that except heart ache! What did she gain except satisfaction — then she probably promptly forgot who I was. It’s the information from people who aren’t a part of your life, they don’t matter.

Now, it’s not to say negative information is always irrelevant. Like I said, if someone says something that does hurt you, but it pushes you to work harder, be stronger, move higher, then that is Relevant Information. It’s all crazy and feels like common sense, but me thinking of it in this way was like a light bulb moment. I was finally able to just let go of all the old friends, the sordid past and start over.

Keeping those people around will harm you, destroy you, dim your light. I realized I didn’t need this repeated social hiatus- not for this reason at least. I just needed to change my circumstances. I needed to change the audience. Get back to what my social media intention is really about— why I use it in the first place.

Minimalism. Declutter, not Deactivate.

I went from around 530 Facebook friends down to 32. (seriously? Old high school classmates that didn’t even like me back then and don’t talk to me now? Random people I met and never connected with again? Hundreds of people I’m dishing my soul out to and expecting them not to trample on it? Yeah. No.) I kept only the people I felt I truly wanted to keep. Then I deleted a few dozen more. As my guy suggested, join groups you like and the people who are into those topics will fill your page. It’s kind of like keeping the things that “spark joy” only…virtually.

I want my social media – my feeds – to be about Books, Writing, amazing places Traveled, and philosophy. Instead of my hiatus I’m re-tailoring with honesty in mind.

Week 3 Summary

Since you stuck around after that whole thing, thank ya thank ya. I’ll keep my summary of this week brief.

I met up with the Black Moms group for my area yesterday and it was amazing. I really feel like I might have found a community here that can help me and provide fun events that aren’t so solitary. I met several cool women with age variety – and a surprising amount of twin moms. We sat, had tea and cackled over all things culture. I definitely want to make it a point to attend more events in the future.

It really sucks not having a laptop. I honestly don’t know how I’m going to do the business, writing and editing, university work, and freelance work from my IPad. If anyone wants to gift me a laptop, I’d love it. I’m laughing but boy am I serious. Har har har. We’ll figure something out eventually. We always do.

I’ve read almost 118 books this year. My goal was 100 due to the baby and switching universities. Most of those were in the second half, and a ton of that can be thanks to audio books. I use Overdrive which is a free app you can link to your library card. Oh man, I’ve read/ listened to so many in the last three weeks. Y’all should check it out.

Lastly, I’ve been keeping the apartment clean!!! Yaaaaaas! I’m so happy because now that I’ve made it into this routine I can clean so much faster and so much easier. I’m loving this minimalist life and I know I still have more to get rid of but the hard work is done.

One more week of Introspection, guys! Then I’ll spend the last 3 days of December reflecting over the month. Cherchez La Vie is the last Sunday of the month. That’s the real holiday, I can’t wait to look over the last 6 months and set goals and plans for the next 6. Things are turning out better than I thought and I’m feeling like a better, mentally healthier, and lighter person already.

Don’t forget to let me know in the comments your thoughts, goals or aspirations. Are you a minimalist? Interested? Yogi? I want to know it all, let’s chat.

 

Good Readdance,

Jade

To help me with my writing skills, my guy suggested that at least 50/100 of the books for 2020 have to be in a genre other than Romance and Detective/Mystery. Game on! I’ve already dug into science fiction a lot this year and I’m ecstatic about it, taking any and all suggestions!

31 Days of Introspection: Week 2: Social Media Hiatus

 

Answer my question in the comments to help me decide! 

 

Heya,

This Second week of 31 Days of Introspection has been so up and down. Great things and also crappy things. A destruction of my computer, my realization that I have  no real close friends, the joy of seeing Naomi grow and the upset at books being destroyed.

I do feel like I’ve made a ton of progress emotionally. The apartment is much better now as well. I’ve donated over 1,200 books and gotten rid of so much clutter. The sad thing is that I got the dates mixed up and I put everything out on the curb too early. I used a donation pick up service and we woke up the next day to find everything still there. It had rained the night before and all of the books that we’d set out were damaged. So the whole “they’re going to a good place” ideal is gone. My precious books didn’t go to a nice place. They won’t be enjoyed by some happy family. I didn’t do a “good deed” because all the books I’d collected over the years, and gazed at on my shelves, went to the trash.

So yeah. But at least my place has less stuff. Unfortunately, having less doesn’t fix my “messiness” and I’m struggling to keep things straightened. I know some people say you’ve got to clean as you go. I try so hard, but what ends up happening is I work work work, then I take a break, then work work work, and things get messier and messier. Then I am overwhelmed at that point and I don’t want to clean. Anyhow, I’m trying to get better and some days everything is together and some days it’s like today: work shop things everywhere.

So one of the crappy things that happened this week is the destruction of my MAC. I was holding Naomi and trying to feed her. Was sitting at the table and doing the whole breast milk from the refill bottle into empty drinking bottle and Naomi, happily and with a highpitched squeal, kicked out. The refilled bottle spilled on the Mac and the rest is history. That was a few days ago. No more YouTube videos, no more recordings for audio books, no more…no more a lot of things. I actually had to remove the “Lined” option for my journals for a day until I could create a new template using my IPad. Ugh, this is all just horrible.

So, apparently, it’s not worth it to fix my computer. I took it to the Mac store. They looked at it and they said it would cost $700 in order to fix it. In order for me to get a new one, or a Mac Book Air it would cost me $1100. That’s bullshit! How is it that expensive? That’s just crazy. I digress. I’m going to have to do everything I can to use my iPad for everything: university work, the business dealings, watching TV and anything else. I’ve never had to use it for all that stuff before so I honestly don’t know what all it can do. I’m just sad about it all.

ANOTHER great thing…NAOMI CAN CRAWL!!! OR at least…throw herself forward. It’s absolutely amazing to see her growing and progressing right before my eyes. She’s so beautiful, so luminous. Sometimes I just watch her, trying to discover things, trying to put things in her mouth, ew, and just…living. It’s all so amazing.

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So, in the beginning of this month I decided to take a social media hiatus. Last week’s summary was about how low my Twitch (the amount of times I itch to get on social media) was. This week you’ll be disappointed to find that I broke my hiatus. At first, I was upset about Google and their mandatory security practices, and needed to vent and I, admittedly, felt annoyed at myself that I broke my promise to myself. Then I thought “hmmm, well I’ve already broken my promise. I might as well go ahead and go all in”. Bad idea. I know. What I discovered is that no one cared. Cares. No one missed me. No one wanted to talk to me or wanted to reach out. No one remembered me or thought of me, that I could tell. In the spirit of honesty, because that’s what this month is all about, that’s one of my greatest fears. Being forgotten. Not being important. It stems from my deeply rooted issues with my childhood abandonment- fostercare, child abuse, and all that jazz.

So, when I noticed that most of my notifications were those “____ people commented on a photo/post you are following” I broke down. Not literally, there were no tears or complaining to my guy. NO posts filled with shade, “wondering” where everyone was. There was just silence. I felt numb. Resolved. This was a part of the reason I knew I needed to take a step back from social media. Other people shouldn’t be responsible for whether I feel important enough. Guess that’s the issue with replacing a true human connection with an artificial and electronic one. It kind of reminds me of the months after my daughter Iris Giana died. I was so alone, even my mom didn’t care, didnt call or reach out to me, even though I almost died. It was…distressing.

That being said, I  know what I’ll do at the end of the day. I’m resetting everything. I’m possibly making a my business FAcebook. I’m going to keep my Instagram and Twitter but I’ll limit my usage of them to over just a few hours a day. I’m letting the past go. The funny thing is that unless people read this post (is anyone really?) no one will know. I’ll just slip away. uGH. I wonder why this makes me want to take a deep breath and meditate.

So, was breaking my social media hiatus in a rushed need for my druglike fix worth it? Yes…and no. Yes, and no. But mostly yes, because I learned things.

 

So I’m thinking about becoming a pescatarian- with the exception of bacon, of course. I’m really wanting to try new things. I’m just bored with the same hubbub. The only thing is that fish is soooo much more expensive than chicken, beef, or turkey. Do you know any good pescatarian dishes? have you ever tried this lifestyle? Let me know your thoughts in the comments.

This week I downloaded a business app that will train me in skills every small business owner needs. It’s called Primer and it has great examples and animations so that anyone can learn. I just finished 2 lessons on branding and plan to do the marketing and advertisement lessons next.

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One of the awesome things I did this week is watch a ton of videos on product photography. I then went down to Lake Eola and took over 140 photos. Then,  because my computer is down, I had to take a trip to the library to upload everything. It worked out, if only because Naomi loves books, and I will be making changes to my shop as soon as I can. One of the best things in my entire apartment…my DSLR.

I’m also adding these new mini notebook sets to my shop. I’m really excited about it all. I feel like this will all work out. Everything will be ok. Be…just fine.

 

Happy Readdance,

Jade

Book Review: His Lover’s Little Secret by Andrea Laurence

Hi! So I am actually glad that I dug into my boxes of books. I just recently moved into my new apartment and I brought maybe ten boxes of books with me. I have been collecting books ever since I was a young child. Yes, I say collecting because at first I would just buy books I couldn’t find in the libraries and then I realized…with the amount of books I have I could start my own library. That’s what I plan to do. I plan to start a library and have the ability to say I’ve read each and every one of them.

Oh yeah, so I dug into my boxes and found a few random gems. His Lover’s Little Secret was one of those gems. I read it while I was at work because it was on of the slowest days possible and the book isn’t a hard read nor is it very long. The characters written in the novel are so deep and complex. You wouldn’t think so if you were to judge it by the fact that it’s a Harlequin but it’s true. Gavin is definitely one of my favorite antagonist ever. He’s strong, matter of fact, put together but not necessarily controlling. Yes, as a CEO he spends a great deal bossing and giving orders but he’s such a sweetheart you forgive him. His true and honest love for his son is every girls true dream in a father for their child.

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When I read the back of the novel again, I was taken aback for a minute. The story plot is not uncommon and I half expected it to be one of those that irritate every nerve. I hate it when girls call a guy a deadbeat or not a good father but didn’t even tell him that he had a child. It really grinds my gears because they then spend the entire book making demands and statements like “you don’t deserve”, “prove to me…” and “he’s MY child”. It makes me want to reach into the pages, grab the woman by the neck and shake. Knock some sense into them and say “HE COULD’VE BEEN THERE FROM THE BEGINNING HAD YOU ONLY TOLD HIM!” Luckily, I didn’t have to do that this time. Of course, she spent the first few days trying to convince him she was right in not telling him but she redeemed herself by allowing him to be involved.

Andrea Laurence did a great job of bringing it full circle and making them very well rounded. I’M even in love with little Jared! Thanks!! Read to find out if this duo can get it together and how they survive a kidnapping! Love it!

Jade

Book Review: Shadow Rider by Christine Feehan

Hey guys! So I have a weird review to write today. I was not really a fan of this novel. In my honest opinion, I would not recommend it for anyone to read. This is the first novel of the Shadow series and I believe the newest Christine Feehan novel.

I’m not sure if the reason I disliked the novel was because I just went through a victim and domestic abuse class or something else but it seems pretty logical. I spent almost the entire novel cringing at how often the relationship reminded me of Stockholm Syndrome, verbal abuse and uncontrollable behavior. Stefano spent most of the book threatening to chase her down if she tried to leave, threatening to tear anyone’s head off should they dare to look at her for too long or having his family members chase her around.

Hey, I understand that she was scared and that she needed to be protected but gosh…like, can a girl breathe? At one point, he even told her that she could feel free to speak her mind but it wouldn’t matter because he’d do what he wanted. I also understand that since the Fifty Shades of Grey women came out of the woodworks, “romance” authors are starting to make their alpha men even more controlling and strong willed. They have to feed into the fantasies of the women who want to be dominated, told what to do and forced to stay.

I am not one of these women.

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The actual story plot seems to have a very great foundation. It does seem like it has a lot going on, though. It’s as if someone took a jumble of ideas, narrowed them down to…100 bullet points and crammed them into one novel. I like the idea of shadow riding and using the tubes but…I’m not sure, its something about it that’s just…too much.

If you’ve read this novel, please let me know how you felt. Did you get the same vibes I did or were you completely taken away by the novel?

Tell me, tell me!!!

Jade

Book Review: Chesapeake Bay Series by Nora Roberts

Hey all!!

I just read the first two romance novels in this series. It is a very beautiful series. I have cried several times reading it but then again, I am a very emotional woman. The series circles around the Quinn brothers, kind of a catch all family for the unwanted, the sold and the broken. Often times, I wonder how some authors come up with the basics for these stories.

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Ethan’s back story (Rising Tides) really hurt my heart. I can identify with his unease around strangers and the want to be somewhere comfortable. The raw emotions he emits tear you up inside. Nora’s descriptions really sell these men as if they were living and breathing beings.  Cameron’s (Sea Swept) made me laugh and I also understand how it feels to be used and abused. His anger towards his adopted father and yet grief at his sudden death is felt through the pages. I’m currently reading Philip’s story (Inner Harbor) and I’ve cried in the last chapter. His charming personality hides an inner turmoil that makes you laugh but also wonder what he’s really thinking.

 

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Nora Roberts plucks at the heartstrings in each story she tells in this series. She’s found a way to wrap the Quinn brothers around your fingers and make you fall in love with them. I didn’t know there was a fourth book in these series until I looked up the covers to do the review. I will definitely be acquiring that as soon as I finish Inner Harbor! Will this be Seth Quinns story? Who will it be!? I’m excited to find out.

 

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Jade

Long Little While

You’d be surprised how much you missed something when you’ve been away for a while. I talked to someone recently about my love of reading and they mentioned how I should write reviews. I thought to myself ‘I do!’ but I knew that I hadn’t been consistent with writing them. I don’t think there is any real science behind it, I just think that my love for reading has suddenly outweighed my love for writing reviews.

Don’t get me wrong! I love love love to review novels but I just get so caught up in the stories that I end up reading the next novel and not writing the review. I have sooooo many book reviews to write. I’ve at least read 4 books a week for the last month and a half. Each of them will be getting a review, it’s just a matter of time.

I look forward to the long nights until I get them all done and I hope that you enjoy them.

I love feedback guys! If you hate my reviews, let me know! If you love my reviews, let me know! If you have read the book before, please…let me know and tell me how you felt about it!

 

Jade

Book Review: Loves Music, Loves To Dance by Mary Higgins Clark

Hi!

So I am beyond excited to do a review on this novel! When I was in private school I found myself as a definite outcast amongst the other students. You might say that it was because I didn’t come from a rich family like many of the others and that i just didn’t relate to them in anyway. The honest answer is just that I was very shy back then. I didn’t really know a lot of people and wasn’t very good at making friends.

You might’ve guessed, I spent most of my childhood with my nose stuck in chapter books. The majority of the books I read were romance novels. I  was caught up in the whirlwind of what it meant to be in love, the tug and war of the relationships and how the heart comes together. Then it was like the flood gates of everything amazing opened and rained down on me. I came across a novel by Agatha Christie and my heart swelled. All things mysterious, intriguing and thriller flowed out. I was referred to read Mary Higgins Clark by a teacher and I was skeptical. Agatha was the only step I’d taken to broadening my horizons and I balked at the idea.

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I fell in love with her style of writing. I had no idea what I was in store for. A few days ago I found one of her novels in a thrift store and I instantly knew I had to buy it! The story was one of my favorite in all of the books and genres I’ve ever read. The entire time I was on the edge of my seat. I literally jumped up, screamed and did a little dance when the killer was revealed. It was a really great story!

It was basically like reliving my childhood, curling up and unable to put the book down. I was angry, at one point, that the other characters in the story weren’t paying attention. I screamed “pay attention” at least ten times! To my hearts content, there was even a romantic storyline at play!

You have got to read this novel!

Good Readdance!

Jade

Book Review: Renegade by J.A. Sounders

Hey all! I’ve been away for a while so I figured I’d come back and do all the reviews for the books I’ve been reading over these last few months. I was looking through the Orlando paper and I saw that it has really great  suggestions for fun things to do in Orlando. Most of the events are very low priced but alot of them are totally free!! Anyway, so I found out that there was a Book Convention going on at the library and I just HAD to check it out!

Once there, I walked around and talked with a few of the authors that were there. Most of them I hadn’t heard of. I was just leaving when I walked past J.A. Sounder’s table. I had been by earlier in the day when the writers hadn’t arrived yet and was instantly drawn to her cover. Brandished on the table was a note saying “Free novel…just come say hi!” and OF COURSE that was a hook, line AND sinker! So I stopped by, quite oddly I might add, and she said hello. She was super nice and I introduced myself.

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She gave me a book for free just as the sign said! After signing it, she gave a big smile and I knew it’d be the first one I’d read out of all the books I’d bought that day! I saw in the cover that this was the first book she’d written and instantly I was worried. I wasn’t sure what to expect and for some reason wasn’t feeling like being all that adventurous! Boy, was I in for a great surprise!

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Now, on for the review. I absolutely loved the novel! It was crazy, it was filled with gore, it was filled with blood and fighting! As most people know, I am a sucker for romance! It had a great romance plot, one that I was on board with the entire time! I loved this new world that the author formed! The beauty of it just made me want to go there, not to get killed of course but to be under the ocean and watch the fish swim by. I wanted to go through Evie’s garden and take the tube from one sector to another. The story is very well crafted and thought out. It was filled with mystery, intrigue and true eye-opening surprise. It took me less than a few days to read this novel because I did NOT want to put it down at all. I was hooked from the first chapter!

 

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It seems like the further I got into the book I kept wondering why no one has snatched this novel up yet. It has everything that you’d want to see before you. I mean come on people!!! After all of these other novels turned major motion pictures!? Why has no one made a movie out of this story yet? Where is the screen play? Where is the great following? If I’m so excited about this YA  novel that so should you be! Ugh…it actually seems weird to me how much I loved it. I can’t wait until I get the second sequel. I believe it’s called Revelations? I’ll have to check it out. I can’t wait to see what is next for Evie!

Thank you J.A. Sounders for catching my eye and thank you for being a great writer! I definitely look forward to the next book and sharing a review of that one as well! Below you can find a link to her page, a few links to where you can buy the book.

Have you already read this book? Let me know what you thought, if you enjoyed it and how you felt! I would love to know!

Jade Elyzabeth

P.S. Stick around, I have more reviews coming up soon!

 

 

J.A. Sounders’ Author page:

Splash: Jessica Souders

Where Can You Buy It?:

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http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/renegade-ja-souders/1109152281?ean=9780765332486